Grace

There are few things that I struggle with on a semi-regular basis. Two of the more serious ones would be showing sensitivity and being gracious to others. It's amazing how having a child can bring to light strengths and flaws in yourself.  I mean, I have always known that I tend to struggle with these things, but when you have a little one these things come up more so; at least I feel that they do.  I think with this post I'm going to focus more on the act of showing grace to others even when I don't want to. 

Yesterday, I had a heartfelt conversation with my sister, Kelly.  I'm sure many of you know her or at least have heard about her.  We have a very close relationship; however, we are very different.  One of the many things that I admire about her is her ability to show grace and to be sensitive; which like I said a bit ago I struggle with.  She has always had the ability to see the best in others; while I tend to judge and be critical of others.  Well, we discussed these things in our conversation, and I have come to realization, well I've always known that I need to do this, but I need to be more gracious to others.  I guess you could say that this is my first step, even though done anonymously to start the process of allowing God to change my heart towards some people. I need to remember that me being difficult does not help matters, but just keeps me bitter.  I guess what really hit me about our conversation yesterday was when my sister said, "You don't want your feelings about this person to be displaced onto Reese; because as she gets older she will catch on."  This really hit a nerve because I don't want influence her in this situation of how I feel or have felt. 

 But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; pardon, and you will be pardoned. –Luke 6:25-37

I realize that I need to let some things go and remember that by me being difficult isn't going to change some people; even though I wish it could in certain situations.  Regardless of how I have felt I have been treated, I need to show grace and forgive, even if the other party is not privy to my feelings and thoughts.  Jesus Christ did this for us, and we surely didn't deserve any of it.  He takes us as we are: broken and unworthy, and loves us!  It's really something to think about.  I'm not saying that it'll happen over night but with consistent prayer, I think I can be better; if not for myself for my daughter.

So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. –Colossians 3:12-13